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sottovoce

I love flowers.
I love spontaneity, and pleasant surprises.
I'm dainty and ambitious; really.
I nurse others.
There's more than meets the eye when it comes to me.


only me



N A D I A H
200788
ngee ann poly
school of health sciences
Children's Emergency, KKWCH

[ e-mail ]

[ facebook ]

reminders

- Dine at Tiffany Cafe & Restaurant at Furama
- Tree Top Walk at MacRitchie

my past

March 2005 April 2005 May 2005 June 2005 July 2005 August 2005 September 2005 October 2005 November 2005 December 2005 January 2006 February 2006 March 2006 April 2006 May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 December 2010

credits

Blogskin done by 16thday with image from Taringa .




Saturday, August 30, 2008

Working life.

The glare from the computer screen is the only light that's helping me see the letters on the keyboard. So don't mind me if you see lots of spelling mistakes. Of course, being me, I'll probably edit the entry if there are any mistakes. That's because grammatical, vocabulary, spelling mistakes are one of my pet peeves. I can't stand it when English are not written correctly. I'm not saying that my English is perfect, but those obvious errors make me cringe. Anyway, I'm not here to talk about English. I'm here to rant.

Currently, I'm utterly dissatisfied with my life. If I were to take the short quiz on How Happy Are You?, like the one Oprah took with her audience, I'd fail miserably. Work hasn't been really good. And this time, I'm not exactly talking about the patients. Working life is so full of politics. And I've been misunderstood and lectured that I'm actually shocked. Can you imagine, you've always thought of yourself as very helpful. You'd do anything that's being asked of you. The right stuff, anyway. You're the kind that has difficulty saying no when someone's in need of help. But someone comes along and says you're lazing around. It's like a slap in the face! It ruined the rest of my day. And when you found out that people has been talking about you behind your back. I would say it hurts. Now I can understand how some of my colleagues feel.

I think my problem is that I've low self esteem. My confidence level is not very high and it seems to be dropping. So people would say, build up your confidence. Be confident. But how the hell do I do it?

Well, basically, right now, I feel so shitty. Today, for the first time, I broke down because of work. I feel like the world's against me. People hate me. And I'm starting to hate people too. At this point in my life, I feel like such a fake. I'm faking my smile, I'm faking the friendly tone in my voice. It's a good thing I'm wearing a mask. A wall's building up and I don't know if anybody can knock it down.

In my own world,
4:46 AM