Blogskin done by 16thday with image from Taringa .

He picked me up from work in his car.
He made my heart pound when he touches me.
He paid for the movie tickets (but I paid him back, didn't feel good).
He paid for the popcorn (which I hardly ate, too nervous).
He brought me to the nearest drive-through Mcdonald's so I could buy my mom her Fillet O Fish.
He drove me home.
He loves the smell of my hair.
He walked me to the lift of my apartment.

Somehow, I don't think this is going to work out.

But then, he called me.
He made me laugh when I joked with him.
He wanted to bring me out for super early breakfast when I told him my stomach was "ringing" (said he'd turn around and come pick me up again, but I said no).

But, I still think it ain't gonna happen.

So I guess it's not Part 2; it's the end.
In my own world,
12:46 AM

His name's Chris.
He's 27.
He's working.
He drives a car.
He's 20cm taller than me.
He makes me laugh.

He asked me out.
In my own world,
11:14 PM

Work was hectic today. Hardly had a break. I didn't even eat a proper meal. KKH's Children's Emergency was packed. There wasn't a lull at all during the whole time I was there. The waiting time was close to 4 hours! So you can just imagine what could happen when people are made to wait for that long. Parents became demanding. It was hell.

"When is it my turn?", "This is ridiculous you know.", "The numbers are not moving.", "We have been waiting for hours now and my child is sick!", "How much longer do we have to wait?", "This is ridiculous. Make your system go faster!", "So my child is not sick, not an emergency? They don't have the priority?".

Oh my God. Seriously. Is it OUR fault? So what if your child has fever? Almost every patient here has a fever. What do you want us to do? Make them all stand in a line and hose them down? I just don't find having a fever for 2 days is an emergency, unless the child seems utterly lethargic or dehydrated. It's so irritating. They have no idea what an emergency is. Argh! One of the demanding parents made one of my staff cry because she (my staff) was super damn frustrated. She had to hide in the tea room to get herself together and our Sister went to talk to the parent. Seriously. I think nurses should get a bloody raise.

Anyway, good thing about today is, I like the staff I'm working with. Plus, *shriek + fits*, I did bandaging with Dr. Benny Loo! And we conversed! And Dr. Derek Quah! Oh my God! I laughed with him today. Haha. I don't want to say more. Later, what people will think sia.

I love A&E! Nurses and doctors work very closely together. We even eat in the same room. Unlike in the wards or OT. I meant the CGH OT, I don't know about other OTs. Doctors eat in one room and nurses in another.

On to another topic. Yesterday, I went for my driving lesson. I learnt how to do a U-turn. At this cross junction, while doing a U-turn, I heard this super loud and long horning. I really thought I was doing something wrong and dangerous like turning into oncoming traffic or something. It was only when my instructor spoke up that I realized the horn came from ME! Hahahaha. I horned at myself. I must have accidentally pressed the horn while turning the wheel like some kan-chiong woman. Haha. Scared me half to death. Paiseh sia. But my instructor was ok. I got him as an instructor 3 times already. He's one of my favourite instructor. He already recognizes me. Haha. Embarrassing. My instructor said everyone was looking at me during that self-horning period. Good thing no one will recognize me.

After lesson, guess who I saw! Azfar! I just reached the bus stop and being me, I'm the kind who don't look around at people. So then, I got a text message. It was from Azfar. It said, "I think I saw you!". And I was like "Where?" and I started looking around. I realized this guy standing in front of me, which looked like Azfar but I wasn't sure. And he was using his handphone too. Smiling at it. Then he replied "You're at the bus stop right?". Then I actually stepped forward to approach him but when I look at his side view, I was like eh? Is that really him? Since I didn't want to embarrass myself twice on the same day, I quickly stepped back and then replied "Yea.. and you're right in front of me. I think." So I watched the guy in front of me read his text on his phone and I saw him smiling and then he turned around. Hahah, yup, it was him. Who would have thought we'd meet at the driving centre? Haha. Like his usual self, since the MI days, he teased me. Lembab, dia kata I? Kurang asam.

Anyway, I wanna start small and simple and cheaper first.

Mazda 2

And then maybe, just, maybe,

Lexus SC in Starfire Pearl
In my own world,
8:41 PM

Dr. Benny Loo.

=)
In my own world,
8:34 PM

One of my hamster died today. I got a text from my mom and my sister when I was at work. I cried, but controlled the tears from rolling out of my eyelids. I lost a baby. I think if I was the one who saw my darling hamster not moving, dead, I'd bawl in my bed for several minutes.

When I first got the news, I got sad. And then anger came over me. A few days ago, that hamster suffered a scratch from the inner corner or his eyes down to his nose. I just knew I had to bring him to a vet. I should have brought ALL of them to the vet to get them a check up, fix their teeth and cut their nails. But NOOOO, my mom said "There's no need, there's no need." GOD! I am so mad right now! I knew a vet was in place. And I STILL need a vet to see to my other two hamsters. ARGH! But thinking of how discouraging my mother is of seeing the vet makes me so angry that I can cry.

Anyway, Fiza, Nadhirah and I went out after work and caught a movie after having a bite at Burger King. We saw Harold & Kumar at The Cathay. Goodness gracious. It's a good thing I didn't catch that movie with a guy friend. I'd have died from embarrassment and shock. I'm never going to watch this kind of M18 movie again. Quoting from somewhere, "Must watch!"? AS IF. This is another movie I wouldn't have minded leaving half way and get another movie.

Although we went out today, to me it didn't feel like a real whole outing cuz Sheryn was unable to attend. Our initial plan was to have the 4 of us going out together. But twice something came up. So hopefully there'll be another day where all four of us are able to make it. We're also planning to take a long leave next year to tour some country in Europe or something together. But, yea, you know. It might not go the way we plan. I want to have hope in it but at the same time, I don't cuz I'm afraid of being disappointed.

I got my graduation robe yesterday night. I find it ugly. It's huge and has a thousand pleated folds in it. I just don't get why it has to have pleated folds. Can't wait to get the whole ceremony over and done with.

I have a crush on one of my driving instructors. Hong Fu is his name. Hahah. He's so friendly and likes to talk and comment on little things. Good and funny comments. He asks questions and seems interested, unlike some, asking for the sake of asking out of politeness. He's the kind I can imagine who'll talk about minor things while on the phone at night, lounging on the bed, making the girl on the other end giggle and have butterflies fluttering excitedly in the pit of her stomach. Haha. What's more, he thinks of his mama. So sweet. And he's exactly 20cm taller than me. Hahah. Stop your dreaming, Nad. But seriously, he is really, really funny. And God knows I like people who makes me laugh.
In my own world,
9:21 PM

I miss Dr. Chew Wei Da. I wanna see him again so that my heart will get some workout.

Work has been good so far. A&E rocks to the core. Patients just come and go, come and go. When it's free, not so many patients, it's REALLY free. But when patients start coming in in the late mornings onwards, when it becomes busy, it's REALLY busy. And kids are just adorable especially those who don't cry too much. They're so cute. Today, I did an ECG on this 6 year old boy. He asked A LOT of questions: Must I lie down? (Yes.) Can I stand while doing this? (Haha. No.) Can I put my hand like this? (No. I need you to put it straight by your sides so I can put these stickers.) What are you doing? (Feeling for the place where I should put these stickers.) Is it going to be painful? (No.) What are you doing now? (Putting on the stickers.) What stickers are these? (They're where I can attach these wires to.) Can I see them? (Sure.) Why do you have to put these stickers? (So I can check your heart.) What are these wires? (The wires, I'll clip them to the stickers so it will show on the screen.) Is it going to be painful? (Haha no. You won't feel anything.) Why did you pull my shirt back down over the stickers and wires? (You want me to open ah? It's for privacy, your modesty.) What is that sound? (It's being printed.)

Then there was this parent who I think is hearing impaired. Cuz he gestured that he couldn't hear. His child was admitted and we had to send them up to the ward. Sheryn accompanied them. I would have gone too so I could try and use my sign language skills. But I forgot the parent was HI and didn't follow Sheryn. Regretted it sia.

Went for driving lesson after work. Not bad. Not bad. After the lesson I saw this instructor that I thought was one of my previous instructors. This instructor has been my instructor for 2 lessons. Both lessons with him I was wearing the tudung. Today, I didn't wear the tudung since I was in uniform and came straight after work. Plus I was wearing glasses. So I thought of saying hi to him and see if he recognizes me. So I tapped on his shoulders and he turned around and I said, grinning, "Recognize me?" He went like "Errrr.. who ah?" And I was like "I wear tudung", while also taking note of his crooked teeth and thick dark eyebrows. That's when a tiny bit of doubt came over me. Then he was like "Ohh.. eh, how come ah?" Meaning why I'm not wearing the tudung. At least that's what I thought he meant. So I just told him that I came straight from work. He knows I'm a nurse cuz he guessed before during one of my previous lessons with him. "So, now lesson finish ah?" I said yes. "Oh okay." And I said "Ya.. haha ok. Bye!" And I left.

While walking to the bus stop I was like "Shoot! Did I greet the correct person? Was that my previous instructor?" The sight of his crooked teeth came into mind. "Was my instructor's teeth that crooked? Was that him? Or did I get the wrong person?"

OH MY GOD. Can you imagine if I got the wrong person? What if he wasn't one of my instructors at all? Maybe he had NO IDEA who I am. I could have just made a fool out of myself. Anyhow only.. "recognize me?" I shouldn't be so daring the next time I'm not sure if I know the person. I really hope the guy I greeted was the instructor I had in mind. Paiseh sia.

Today I felt guilty and scared. Sheryn reassured me. Thanks, girl.

I want a Mazda 2.
In my own world,
6:01 PM

No one believes their life will turn out just "kind of" okay. We all think we're going to be great. And from the day we decide to be nurses, we are filled with expectations. Expectations of the trails we will blaze, the people we will help, the difference we will make. Great expectations of who we will be. Where we will go.

And then... we get there.

We all think we're going to be great. And we feel a little bit robbed when our expectations aren't met. But, sometimes, our expectations sell us short. Sometimes, the expected simply pales in comparison to the unexpected.

You gotta wonder why we cling to our expectations. Because the expected is just what keeps us steady... standing... still. The expected is just the beginning.

The unexpected... is what changes our lives.
In my own world,
9:14 PM

I came down with flu on Labour Day. The next day, Friday, I almost didn't want to come to work but I did. So the whole day I suffered with flu and during mid-day, I got such a horrible abdominal pain that I hid in the toilet for a few long minutes. It's not the want to pass motion kind of pain. More like pins and needles. My nose tap was on the whole day.

When I got home, I collapsed on my bed. I took a Piriton in the evening and then collapsed into bed again. At night, I seriously couldn't take it anymore. So I searched my medicine cupboard for other means of helping with my flu. Found this Lemsip thing for cold and flu. It's powder in sachets to make it into a hot drink. I thought it was going to be bitter so I added 3 levelled teaspoonful of sugar. Super sweet sia! But I forced myself to drink. Drank half then couldn't take it already. I don't want to get diabetes.

Dragged myself to iron my uniform and pack my bag for today. And then went to bed thinking how to get out of my driving lesson today. When I fell asleep I was half expecting to get an MC the next day, skip work and cancel my driving lesson. But when I woke up, I was surprised at how good I felt. Not totally well, but much better than the day before. Before leaving for work, I thought of taking another dose of the Lemsip drink. Made it, while taking the first few sips, I read the back of the sachet. Got a surprise when I saw that it contained 1000mg paracetamol. I know by taking another dose of this drink will not take me to the toxic level but I became super cautious and threw away my drink. Plus I can't remember what time I took my last dose. So, off to work.

And driving lesson.

I hate driving!! I don't think I can pass! Annoying like hell sia. I should have taken Auto istead of Manual. Like who cares if I can't drive Manual in the end? Who said I will have to drive a manual car? Irritating. It's not as if there isn't any nice Auto car out there. Bleahx! Stupid la. I have another lesson tomorrow morning. I'm seriously dragging myself to driving lessons sia.


By the way, we three were sick on Friday. Nad had the sniffles and one slightly swollen eye, I had the 3 day flu and soon to have sore throat/cough and Fiza had fever, muscle ache and the sniffles. Because of her fever she got to go home earlier.
In my own world,
7:15 PM