Blogskin done by 16thday with image from Taringa .

I was at a bonding camp for the last two days. Bonding camp pre-trip to Cambodia. It was quite fun but tiring. The games are like testing your endurance. I used all muscles that I've not really maintained for a long time. And now I'm aching all over. It's difficult to even get out from the bed. And I have a bruise on my arm which I can't remember how I got it. Anyway, I had fun.

Leaving tomorrow.

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I was watching Oprah just now. It was about people suffering from Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD). It's when people look at the mirror and think they're SO ugly when they're really not. There's even this 28-year-old woman who already had 26 plastic surgeries. She looks.. erm.. very surprised. The whole time. She compares herself to celebrities, wanting Michael Jackson's nose, Jeniffer Aniston's jaw, Jeniffer Lopez's profile.

You shouldn't really compare yourself with others. Cuz there will definitely be someone who's thinner, nicer, taller, more talented, richer than you. So the best thing to do is not to compare cuz it's all about you.
In my own world,
1:54 PM

One word for you, menyampah!! If you're so good, I don't know why you got such horrible grades during O-Levels that you were rejected by all. Or was it your last choice that you got into?

Anyway, I feel sick. It was the weirdest thing. Both Melissa and I got a sudden bout of sneezing and runny nose and watery eyes. At the same time.

It was the last day of attachment today at IMH. I already miss some of the patients and the staff. I miss SN Richard! Hmm.. are all Richard's nice? I know 2 Richard's so far, both I knew from clinical attachments, who made a huge impact. Ask Melissa. She'll agree with me. It's a pity I won't have a chance to work with either of them.

If I'm not bonded to KKH, I'd have tried for a sponsorship at IMH. I'm trying not to regret my choice here.

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Most people who knows me would say I think too much. But I'm not very reflective. Rarely, I make intelligent reflections. Therefore, I would have done badly for a GP. I think I'm more of a narrative kinda person. Which doesn't sound very intelligent or impressive.


Dear God, I miss IMH. I really do.
In my own world,
5:20 PM

I love to read Muliana's and Natalie's blog. Their English are really good and the way they expressed themselves are so well done and NOT very emo with secret messages. Their blogs are like my daily newspapers.

Anyway, today our exam results came out. I did better than I'd expected. YAY! There was another thing that I said I did better than I'd expected... OH ya. My O&G posting. YAY!

My GPA has gone up by 0.5 points. Which is A LOT, mind you. I improved. This makes me want to get even higher grades. The motivation is in full force right now. GO NADIAH!

One thing that I cannot stand about the grades is that when I get a B+, it could mean that I got somewhere between 75-79 over a 100. If I got a B+ because my marks was 75 or 76, I don't really mind. But can you imagine if I got a B+ because my marks was 79, or even 79-point-something? Just by 1 mark or less, I could have gotten an 'A'! And you know I feed on getting A's for my exams. So the thought of just missing it is quite.. miserable.

Therefore, I have to pull my socks up and buck up. No more late revision. Start revision the first day when school reopens. I might need a pusher.

2 more days and attachment is OVER.
In my own world,
5:30 PM

I just finished watching the 15 episodes of Hua Yang Shao Nian Shao Nu. It's the SWEETEST show I have EVER seen. It's SO sweet that I feel like my heart is being squeezed and all the blood is coming out. It's the kind of feeling in your chest that is quite painful but also makes you go "Ahhh...". Ella is really lucky to act with Wu Zun. I could feel jealous but she's just too cute and seem really nice and funny that it's hard NOT to like her.

The show is also the funniest EVER. I've never laughed until I need tissues to wipe my eyes. It's also VERY touching that I.. ah.. cried. Again. And the suspense, especially the last episode is SO intense that you find yourself yelling at the TV/computer. But overall, it's really really sweet.

I know I can't have the real WuZun as someone significant in my life but I hope one day, there'll be a WuZun, or rather a Zuo YiQuan, in my life. Someone who really loves me and cares for me and protects me and always be by my side whenever I need him. And of course, vice versa.

I really recommend this show to everyone. You will get hooked starting from the very beginning. It's a promise. You can find it online. Those who doesn't understand Chinese, can go to http://www.veoh.com/channels/LuckyStar. They have English sub-titles. The loading is quite slow so I advice you to open a few episodes in different windows at the same time. It can all load together and you don't have to waste your time waiting for the next episode to load after you finish one. In the meantime, you can do other things.

I seriously recommend it.
In my own world,
1:07 AM

I like the IMH posting so far. One of the things that I observed and surprised me is that the patients are smart. I really didn't expect that. They are actually really wonderful people. Very friendly and some are willing to talk to you. Like they just pour out their hearts kind of thing. They're very cute too. One of them is SOOO cute that I wish I can put my arm around his shoulder, like he's a normal elderly. But it's IMH, so I can't. He's such a dear! His face and his willingness to do activities with us, especially colouring and drawing. And when we praise him or he does something funny, he'll smile and 'laugh'. He can't really talk. I hardly ever heard any sound from him. But after spending time with him colouring and drawing, I find that he's just like a normal person. With feelings and he actually understands whatever we say. Because when you're in Institute of Mental Health (IMH), you tend to think that the patients there can't really understand you or are in a world of their own. But under proper and therapeutic relationship, therapies and medication, they're just like you and me.

Also, this posting actually builds my confidence. It raises my self-esteem. Because I had to approach patients myself and try to talk to them, make conversation and build rapport with them, it forces me not to think too much and pushes me to go for it because I HAD to do it. And I've actually approached more people in this one week than I've ever had in a week outside of IMH. I realized that I'm braver to go up to the patients and ask if they want to play a game with me or do something with me. I used to be quite self-conscious and I fear rejection. But now during my posting, I've had to NOT think so much about what people will think of me and just go for it. I mean who cares what they think of me right? I'm just asking them to play with me. And I've been rejected quite a number of times so I guess the fear is reducing. And after the rejection, I realized the patients really don't care. After that they'll be talking to me and joking around that I find rejection is not that big a deal.

Being in IMH is really good for shaping yourself. It builds your self confidence, lowers your self consciousness, improves your interviewing skills and helps you gain experience on how to build rapport and have a trusting bond and relationship with people. It also teaches you not to under-estimate people. And of course, care and concern should already be there.

Bavani, if you're reading this, go all out to get a sponsorship from IMH. It's a good place to start your nursing career I guess. The staff are great too.
In my own world,
11:42 PM

Ni men hao!!

I have the tendency to deviate more to the Chinese side even though I'm a Malay. Thanks to my dearest friends in secondary school, I have an interest in Chinese. I listen to chinese songs, I take up chinese lessons (which overall I got an 'A'!!), I watch chinese shows and movies, I even prefer Chinese guys to Malay guys. The more I watch 'Hua Yang Shao Nian Shao Nu', the more I want to be involved in the chinese stuff. I wish I learnt Mandarin since young.

IMH posting was alright. Quite interesting. I like the staff nurses. Ta men hen shuai! But for 2 weeks.. a bit too long.

I wanna start everything anew.

Today, I made a mistake.
In my own world,
8:36 PM

KKH posting is over. Not bad. I passed overall. Much better than I'd expected.

Today went to Moral Home for the Disabled Adults with the other Cambodia YEP-pers. I enjoyed myself. All the way home I was thinking of being a volunteer there cuz the staff are SUPER nice and I miss feeding patients. Anyway, one of the staff there, an Occupational Therapist, is a Filipino guy. SO cute. Everyone was saying that he's cute.

I love Hanazakarino Kimitachihe! I watched Episodes 7 & 8 yesterday. SOOOO SWEEET!!! Especially the part when Quan (Wu Zun) was carrying Ruixi (Ella) on his back at the train track there, where he confessed his feelings to her just when the train was passing by. Ruixi didn't hear what he said. But anyway, it was SOOOO SWEEEET!!! Wu Zun is so cute. The way he smiles secretly in the show is OH MY GOD! It's heart-melting.

Previous entry I posted pictures of Wu Zun. Now I shall show you pictures of another guy in the same show who is also as good-looking: Tang Yu Zhe.




In my own world,
3:23 PM